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Exclusive: Steven Cohen’s $14 Billion Hedge Fund Is Fed To The Birds

Guest Of A Guest – This just in: Apparently even billionaires have pest control problems, or so one might surmise from the flock of wild birds terrorizing the SAC trading floor yesterday. Steven Cohen’s $14 billion hedge fund in Stamford closed early on Wednesday, so that the 15+ birds which somehow found their way into SAC’s high security, modern art filled headquarters could be caught and released.

The hedge fund tycoon (who’s estimated net worth is $9.3 billion) has an on-going investigation for criminal insider trading, one of the most famous modern art habits in America, and a serious need for a good exterminator. Sources say the avian influx announced itself yesterday, and despite the early closing, many of the birds are still at large today.

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